Date: Sun, 22 Apr 2001 23:22:37 +0200
From: "FJ" <jeroenvankessel@PASDESPAMhotmail.com>
Groups: alt.alien.vampire.flonk.flonk.flonk, alt.autos.peugeot.sucks, alt.fan.karl-malden.nose,
alt.music.pink-floyd, alt.tv.days-of-our-lives,alt.tv.real-world, rec.sport.golf
Subject: Re: ****I GOT A FREE LOAF OF FRENCH BREAD!!!!******
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"RussellB" <bigfunchy@subdimension.comxremovethisx> wrote in message
news:9bvg01$c7k$2@intimidator.databasix.com...
> They all laughed when "Jugdish Meowenstein" <meowmeow@meowmeow.kitty> said:
>
> >
> >RussellB <bigfunchy@subdimension.comxremovethisx> wrote in message
> >news:9bv5qn$3kl$1@intimidator.databasix.com...
> >> I went to pick up my paycheck on Friday, and after cashing it at the bank
> >I
> >> stopped at Vons on the way home to pick up a loaf of French bread.
> >>
> >> I parked my motor car (Vogel) in the parking lot, just as nature intended,
> >> and ambled into the store. I ambled on over to the bakery section, picked
> >> up my chosen loaf of French bread, inhaled the bready perfume of the loaf,
> >> and noted the price ($1.39 U.S.). Satisfied with the bread and the price,
> >> I tucked it (the bread, not the price) under my arm and ambled over to the
> >> checkout line.
> >>
> >> When my turn came, I ambled up to the cashier. "Hi," I said, engagingly,
> >> and I presented the loaf of bread for purchase. There was a pause. She
> >> looked down at the bread, looked at me, looked down at the bread again,
> >> picked it up, put it down, and said, "Free."
> >>
> >> "Huh?" I replied, wittily.
> >>
> >> "See that sticker?" she said with a sly smile. "'HOT AT 5 P.M. OR IT'S
> >> FREE.' Does that feel hot to you?"
> >>
> >> "Uh...no," was my sparkling rejoinder. "No, um, it's kinda cold."
> >>
> >> "Then it's supposed to be free," she said. "You wanna go ask and make
> >> sure?"
> >>
> >> My snappy riposte: "Yeah...yeah, OK."
> >>
> >> Together, then, we ambled across the market, my cash-filled pockets
> >bulging
> >> ridiculously on the way to the bakery department to get the manager's
> >> blessing for this absurd little giveaway. Into the bakery she went, my
> >> co-conspirator, my protector, my cashier. *My* cashier.
> >>
> >> And out of the bakery she came a few seconds later, my guardian, my
> >> benefactor, *my* cashier, smiling triumphantly and handing me the bread.
> >> "Free."
> >>
> >> Reader, I accepted that bread from her. I took it, and for the first time
> >> since I had walked into that market, I smiled. "Hey, thanks!" I called
> >out
> >> to her, cleverly, as she ambled quickly back to her station, but I don't
> >> think she even heard me. Cradling my free loaf of bread under my arm, I
> >> ambled out of that market and into the parking lot where Vogel awaited me.
> >>
> >> And I never looked back.
> >>
> >>
> >> I look forward to your messages of congratulation.
> >>
> >> Sincerely,
> >> Russell B
> >>
> >>
> > Okay, ya gotcher free loaf of cold French bread. Expand and expound if
> >you would on the issue of the car. Is a Vogel some obscure Eastern European
> >econobox like a Lada, etc?
>
> No. No, it is not.
>
> > Or is it a sort of "pet name" like the 'General
> >Lee' or 'You piece of French Crap' to which I lovingly referred to my old
> >Turbo Peugeot as?
>
> Yes. Yes, it is.
>
> > Please clear this up at your convenience. Ok, bye.
> >
>
Meow.
--
FJ
"My inner child is a mean little fucker." - Widdershins, in:
<3ae138d6.66784465@news.concentric.net>
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